Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Notes On The City That Can Kill(love) You

at the crack of dawn
we turned toward paradise
lost/ in search of kin
rocked by the influx of blank faces/mosaics of god
(or what we think god is…)

we peel the concrete
heard the tar's cry a river of black despair
colored in yellow and red eyed apathy
we carry hope and optimism
kneed deep in corporal punishment
self examined by a cursed moon
and unforgiving sun

the hours are hungry
eat dynamite and dust
this town is twisted
the streets are desolate/deceptive
see the sweat of the homeless
leave their soul on the ground
they are martyrs who live along life
wished dead/forgotten

at the crack of dawn
frail egos will accept
a humiliating way to receive forgiveness
half naked walking down the street
we must learn how to love our bodies
after the laughter

the boulevards are collapsing
with it's uncommon weight
this city is a living/breathing organism
capable of wiping us out
with it's self conscious vanity
(this city is vain)

the poverty is astonishing
empathy devoured from the metropolis
it's constant movement
crushes our movements
crippled focus has detoured our life
into hunger/revolt/hatred
we are stoic/mute

at the crack of dawn
we rise
we breathe
we embrace strange

strange that does not mix
with normality
walk in this city
discover the point in flight
in which we see ourselves on the ground

this(our) shell which only knows how to die (constantly)
this(our) shell alone under the sun
one thought completely occupied with cadence

Who challenges the rain, the fall the collapse of the cross?
the animalism of the peasants/we all urinate on America
our legs parted stiff

at the crack of dawn
these desolate mouths drifting
under the skyscrapers
not connected with anything flesh has
expressed/asserted/released itself in the broad daylight
dreaming above the peons

the liberator fixed
in his whitewash liberation/stone faced emotions
cradles the conquistador/slavemaster/politician
with his contempt
this freedom(audacity) is suffocating
beyond the fingertips of consumption

the reality of famine next door
grenades in the sky
bodies in the trees
feel the anguish (FEEL)

at the break of noon
we mourn/but we are forgetful
let the blood run down the arm
who needs it?

restrain yourself from emotion
like a sobbing prince who's invasion has failed
see the blood-thirst in his eyes
raise his fist
kill us all

at the break of noon
look at the vomiting skeletons
with solidarity written on their skulls
(bondage)bandage themselves with patriotic
red.white.(fuck you)
the famished bastards will kill their fathers
when their find them
choking the blood from their ears
& throwing them in the Atlantic ocean/(cement shoes)
only the fish know the truth

at the break of noon
shotguns are set
on top of lunchroom tables
with beat box ciphers taking place
before the massacre
lesson from the teacher
prayers from the preachers
melodies from the quicksand voices
we are all sinking
bury the fear in the ground
before the first shot is let off

at the break of noon
the desperate come out carrying a stench
the corruption of shadows(sodomy & sacrifice)
cradle the stupidity/hypocrisies
prostitute the body
for the cowardice of American prejudice
see the clowns disguised in face paint hysteria
it’s like bread everyone shares
starting at one Main St.
all the way down to the edge of darkness (the world is flat)
the parade of deformities march
in this great motionless night

the stars mannequin for man's pleasure (SHINE ON)
shine on in this theatrical bomb of the senses

the foolish graffiti writers
think they can't repaint the world
but ambition is admirable
let us all repaint these gutter walls
and blank faces
with vibrant characters of our
innermost desire

at the break of noon
we revive golden moments
in the loneliness of midday
fill the hollow spots in our feet
iron out the skin perfectly
like adolescence

look around the room
nails protruding from the walls
broken plywood floors
beams of lights from the cracked window
a red lamp/a mausoleum of surreal memories
these essential memories
are the ones that keeps us going

concentration on the grandiose moments of our petty lives
look at the buildings
they’re taller than God (or what we think god is...)
have we seen god? No
but it can’t be taller than
the looming memory of The World Trade Center
concentration on the grandiose moments

at the break of noon
this tormented love affair will soon explode
mourn the occasional love we’ve experienced

cut off your penis/breast
palm tree luscious hill mentality/throw it away
learn to love in a new context
with eyes closed/no hands
what do they smell like?
learn the scent/love the chance to be with someone so close
that you can breathe them in

the time will pass swiftly
our skin is not perfect
the stares that feed our childhood is gone
empty lots are now co-ops
playgrounds are now parking garages
only the bus stops & addictions are the same
your friends who were
metal heads long hair stoners
a decade before
now are cradle gun toting hip hop bald head stoners

we stand in corner ink plots leaving footprints
never to be followed/just for decoration

these sunsets slow on our face
this is the evening of our youth
adulthood is crawling behind quietly

one morning we will wake up gray
in debt/broke/skills-less
damn this generation
for lackadaisical attitudes & easy acceptance
for mind numbing substances/experiences

at the rising of night
make room for the laughter
life is short/bald/ too paranoid

feed it whispers/secrets/love talk/gossip
gluttonous cacophony of nonsense
to differentiate what is really worthy
of worrying about

feed it songs/summertime/sunshine
let it drool
love your hands/feet/ribs/teeth/arms/neck/throat/chest

the nighttime is a canvas
on black/burnt like a cloud
feel the anticipation
rolling heavy on our backs
shout your dreams onto passing trains
only real friends will hear us
1,000 miles away
& with our rose colored petal eyelids
each hour passes in felicity
we will enjoy the moments

collage them together like
tiles in a bathroom floor
cracked with a sledgehammer

at the rising of night
their will be shots fired
in protest of everything
it will sound like a parade of fear
ripping holes in the sky
hear the thunder from our hands

this unexpected sorcery
could lull lightning to sleep
run towards the towering inferno
all your answers are there
in the penthouse of soft flesh
that burns slow

(hobos have a god complex)
we will have to learn how to dispose
of our incomplete dreams
this river is overflowing with doubt
this impartial prejudice of optimism
is due to lack of success with love
but we’re still trying

a small apartment
where panic is a fog that lays on us
while we sleep
schizophrenia is the breakfast
we eat
under the table
the television tells us to turn the other cheek
see no evil/hear no evil/be no evil
offer us homicide hotlines
suicide attempts
everything American

at the rising of night
beyond our mother/beyond our father
they do not exist anymore
our hands full of blisters
explode with handshakes
of knives & broken glass

the wind whistles making odd noises
the retinas are sliced off
fingers are bleeding on the concrete
you can see the face of Jesus and Mary
chained to the electric fence
climbing under to escape their religion

borderland jumpers with no passport
red/green/white/gold/platinum card
fingerprints will show us the hanging
no one can spell mercy

in our skin apathy/loneliness
is painted around the scars
make it look like a beautiful lotus
out of the mud shaped like our mouths

on the side of our lips
with muck piling up
the dirt is black and funeral
you’ve never seen lips so black
it’ll make you vomit
like a corpse re-nominated after an election

lick the wounds
get back up
there’s a world to eat

at the rising of night
everyone will run for their lives
stock on clean water
sell their stocks
get D batteries for their flashlights
barricade the windows
with flat screens televisions
survival can be brought/sold/traded
for something more expensive
like codependent thinking

drown out the ideas with
droned radio clones/clowns/carcasses
duct tape the rosary for prayer
the street rips open from falling knees
sell your eyes on the corner
for someone to buy new insight

EAT THE EYES (teach yourself a new way to see)

at the rising of night
we turned toward paradise
lost/in search of kin/friend

rocked by the influx of faces
mosaics of God
but the fire is spreading
into the wee hours of dreams
not enough water in the world to save us

hide in our homes
when the elephants roam
we will see the dogs of war
leading the riots
the pigs are rolling in corporate sweatshops
in line one by one
we will drop every American
old & young


rediscover the secret of great communication
write messages on the wall
tell them your co-ordinates
resist the commercials of sadomasochism/misplaced ethnic programming
throw refrigerators out the window
burn the bible/newspaper/birth certificate
it’s all wrong(WE’RE ALIVE)
that’s all we need no numbers/codes/stripes

watch the ghosts rise from the gravel
a jungle of beasts & twisted machines skinned alive
the vast earth that wishes to contain us
this great earth/great delirium of god’s pain
we have caused love/children
watch the reigns on our jaw tighten for the turn
watch America burn/burn a bonfire at times square

we pray to our god
(or what you think god is…)to save us
it’ll laugh at us
our mouths shall be the calamity of our life
no voice of freedom
swallow our tongues in solitary amusement

an ocean of misery
an ocean of death
an ocean of apathy
an ocean of despair
drink the salt water
it’s what we sweat
(it’s the only water left)

we hobble to our rescue
with sliced Achilles heels
from groveling to pettiness
watch the mirror reflect the absurd

at the crack of dawn
we are severed head from body
our last breath is our last triumph
this horizon is our last picture

watch the thousand deathbearers
walk down our throat
we have nothing left to claim our own
after our death our body will be cut to pieces
fed to piranhas
fed to science
fed to the homeless
repackaged and fed to our children

death traces a black circle above our head
death stares softly into our hollow eye sockets
death laughs into our bones
death gallops in our ribs like a white horse
death is a loving pariah

our skin swells up like exposure to water
we are not sponges but act like it

at the break of noon
we try to reason with the clock
not to keep moving to our extinction
but it does not listen
it moves slowly for our death
smash the glass face in
smuggle the battery from their lives
we will stop time and live forever
we will find ourselves
lost & found/misplaced
in our own homes/in the embrace
of madness/howling at a moon
that will not listen/unleashing
on strangers/thinking 2 plus 2
equal five/staring at the match of slow burning/galloping
like hummingbirds/not breathing
longer that ten minutes/with their daggers/declaring
our lives to something like love
and no one will answer/defying the expectations
someone have gave us and it will disappoint them what!!!/walking around talking to the
trees/standing in the center of a circus/cradling
things we know will hurt us/we will assassinate
pro-create/charm snakes to dance for us


build ourselves higher than our doubt
promise ourselves to fail
then we will have fulfilled a promise

at the rising of night
we will start the fire
we started it because we had a spark to build from
(we are not tired)
we are loving
we are building
we are dancing
at the rising of night
we will start the fire
to light our darkness
with sulfur that will save us

but who will hear us? who would
want to listen? stuff our throats
with bamboo/make it stronger
swallow the unbreakable truth
what will we do? that we will remember
in fifty years

who cares?
we are alive now
no numbers/no codes/no stripes

only a breath to expand around the room
a kiss to immortalize
a love for the millennia
a grandiose moment to remember
apathy is all around us
not inside us

all we need is
and the ability to know what we’re doing
welcome us home with open arms
it’s the first thing we’ll be looking for
we and we alone
will make contact with struggle
secure our position with
drops of sweat through labor
we handle the night
like a wild boar that runs rampage

we and we alone
leap into winds of change
transforming our rights into rules
& making our word/our bond

this city will try to kill us
will throw everything at us
but we will survive like (the survivors we are)
we always have

for we seek a country
not for our hearts
but for our hope
but in order to enter
this optimistic moment wrapped in silver
rectangular entrances that have swallowed continents
and miles of forests
we must ignore it all

our past
our future
our present
hang the shortcomings on long poles
then we will stand on our feet
our soil rich like the whispers kept under the bed

and we will stand
stand on the shoulders of giants
stand in the hour of our malcontent
stand in the dance of the wind
stand under the sun bathed in the light
stand in the blood of our parents
stand in the halls of the unaccepted
stand in the palms of history

and we will love this city
that has made us stronger
than we ever though we would be
and love it until our last breath.

Monday, May 23, 2005

some one asked me "What kind of music do you listen to?" and me being the simple man that i am didn't want to say ROCK AND ROLL!!!, so i said this"

Jimi Hendrix, The Beatles, Radiohead, The Mars Volta, At The Drive In, Nirvana, System of a Down, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Fela Kuti, Public Enemy, BDP, Miles Davis, A Tribe Called Quest, Typical Cats, Bob Dylan, Wu Tang, Elbow, Muse, Talking Heads, The Who, The Jam, Wilco, Cousin, David Bowie, Sigur Ros, John Coltrane, Bob Marley, NAS, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, King Crimson, The White Stripes, And You Will Know Us By The Tail Of Dead, Secret Machines, My Bloody Valentine, Metallica, George Harrison, Jeff Buckley, Prince, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Santana, Rush, The Mona Passage, Blonde Redhead, OutKast, Depeche Mode, Caetano Veloso, O Mutantes, Gilberto Gil, Mahavishnu Orchestra, Bruce Springsteen, Bright Eyes, Cursive, Smashing Pumpkins, Faith No More, Soundgarden, De La Soul, Refused, Bad Brains, Juggaknots, Pearl Jam, Organize Konfusion, Explosions In The Sky, Godspeed You Black Emperor and Mogwai.

(i think they got the message)

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

the weather is too nice to blog
the streets are calling
you should go outside
and eat the sunshine

it's wonderful


Monday, May 09, 2005

and so the sun has set on California
and now it's time to go home
this trip was as good as the last one i took
i think i met alot of more interesting people
maybe didn't have better shows
but took better risks

hung out with some real cool heads
did a radio interview
co hosted one and interviewed Luis J. Rodriguez
saw Rodrigo (RodStarz on Myspace)
met Rod in Havana '97, who's from Chicago
but didn't see him until last summer in Brooklyn
even though i lived in Chicago 3 years and
is close friends with his cousin Andres

Much respect to
Marina Garcia, Dennis Kim, Paul Flores, Wonway, Tina Wong, Caleb Zigas,
Prolertariat Bronze, Suicide Kings, Charles Ellick, Adi Throggs Neck Torres,

but alas Califas
it is time to go home to the Boogie Down Bronx
The Apt #4D
the lunatic mother and father are picking me up from JFK
The World Famous John Pablo
is so missed that only i know how much
i couldn't even talk about him cause i get all moody
that's why i don't call...(don't like missing him)

i heard the weather in NYC
has been unseasonable cold
hopefully it warms up when im there
going to other cities
is always a nice feeling
makes you feel alive (as long as the city is alive)

oh and the news of the moment
System Of A Down and The Mars Volta
on tour this summer
HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!
can it get any better
(well Radiohead, Mars Volta but thats another dream)

ok folks
i hope to see everyone soon
the Bonafide/John Pablo tour of the city
will commence again this week
look out for us

one love
Bonafide Rojas
The Mona Passage